Round of 64
1 Ohio State OVER 16 UTSA-Sullinger and company roll over San Antonio. Well, at least they have the Spurs (lucky bastards).
8 George Mason OVER 9 Villanova-“By George, I believe they’ve done it!” would win a bracket for my favourite expression. America’s favourite little mid major gets a win in March yet again.
5 West Virginia OVER 12 Clemson-Because West Virginia has an alumnus named Jerry West. Perhaps you’ve heard of him, he’s on the NBA logo. Clemson has Strom Thurmond, a former Senator who spoke for days in opposition to the Civil Rights Act. Yeah, I’m going to pick West Virginia.
4 Kentucky OVER 13 Princeton-Will Princeton get this win when Kentucky has to vacate it next year?
6 Xavier OVER 11 Marquette-Because Xavier gets it done year after year, and I’d like to picture Dwyane Wade watching the game and crying. Screw you Dwyame for making me look up the spelling of your first name, every single time.
3 Syracuse OVER 14 Indiana State-Unfortunately for them, Larry Bird isn’t walking through that door. Rick Pitino empathizes.
7 Washington OVER 10 Georgia-Because Isaiah Thomas is great in big games.
2 North Carolina OVER 15 Long Island-I expect this to be surprisingly close. I went to Long Island a couple weeks ago and saw an Islanders game. A native Long Islander summed it up best what the stadium was like, “This is the worst place to watch anything.”
Round of 32
1 Ohio State OVER 8 George Mason-Sorry George, the ride ends here. For the record, I think Jared Sullinger will be a very good pro.
5 West Virginia OVER 4 Kentucky-Kentucky had a six-man rotation during the season. That simply just won’t do in this tournament. On the bright side, at least they won’t have to vacate that many wins.
6 Xavier OVER 3 Syracuse-The X Men have made the Sweet 16 the past three years. Now let’s just hope that nickname catches on, as I see them doing it yet again.
2 North Carolina OVER 7 Washington-Does anyone see Carolina losing this game? I hope I didn’t just jinx that.
1 Ohio State OVER 5 West Virginia-There isn’t much else to say, but I don’t think West Virginia has the goods for an upset of this magnitude.
2 North Carolina OVER Xavier-The X Men are vanquished as North Carolina sets up an epic showdown with Ohio State.
North Carolina OVER Ohio State-In the game of the tournament to this point, North Carolina wins a nailbiter. That’s the difference between Roy Williams and Thad Matta. Also, I think Dick Vitale’s head just exploded over a Duke-UNC Final 4 matchup. Believe it, baby!